MY STORY
For many, the Big Chop seems to be a smooth transition or long awaited moment;
- From growing out relaxed hair for weeks, months and sometimes even years, just anticipating the big day they choose to go natural.
- Or Simply just a spontaneous move to go from long to short.
Either way, this step is embraced with joy, fierceness, anticipation……
As for me, this was a bittersweet day. From horror and fright to something completely different…….
A Little History
On April 13th, 2022, what had to be a simple wash and comb day, turned into one of the longest days of my life.
It started about 3 weeks prior, I was two and a half weeks postpartum, and went to the salon get my natural hair blown out and flat ironed. This was the worse decision that i have ever made for my natural hair. I remember leaving the salon with what appeared to be the perfect straight hair for a natural girl. My hair was bone straight and i loved the flawless looking results. Only one problem….. my hair smelt fried. This scent lingered on for a couple of days.
The Big Day
April 13th, 2022 came around, my « wash day ». My hair was already showing signs of weakness prior to going to the salon. I shampooed, then conditioned my hair. Now it was time to detangle. Clumps and clumps of hair just kept falling out. Just a simple touch through my hair, and hair would fall out. The more it fell, the more i cried. I was scared, confused and panicked. I was left with several patches of breakage. There were no bald spots. The patches were spots where my hair broke off so bad that only the roots of the hairs remained on my hair. My hair was left uneven, with extremely short patches and it appeared very thin because there were not many hairs left with length. This was one of the hardest, most terrifying and painful experiences that I had gone through. Many say « It’s just hair, it will grow back », or « there are worst things that could happen ». And while this is all true, i still felt hurt. I was very emotional, my hair was part of me. I had been growing it for several years. How could anyone understand what i was feeling?
With much hesitation and tears, i made the decision to do the only thing that could have been done at that time…….The « BIG CHOP ».
How was i going to look? i haven’t worn my hair short in years, how should i cut it? How low should i cut it? Will this style suit my face, Will i like it? So many questions. But one thing is for sure, my hair was uneven, unhealthy and had to be cut.
My daughter volunteered to cut my hair. I was a bit hesitant at first, but then i thought ”why not”? This was a great opportunity for us to bond also. She was very happy to do so, i allowed her to, and she did a fantastic job. At first, we tried to preserve as much hair as possible. i wasn’t ready to rock a boy cut haircut. This seemed a bit to sudden for me. She cut it low, but not too low. Although it was cut and almost leveled with the patches, my hair kept shedding. She then proceeded to cut even lower. My hair kept breaking. I exhaled in despair. We had to do it….. We had to do the boy cut i was dreading. We had it trimmed and decided on a mohawk shaped haircut.
Present Day
It took me a moment to get used to my new hair cut. it changed my face. My features looked different….And you know what, I love it. My haircut was edgy and modern. It took a moment, but it helped increase my confidence and i now rock my new haircut with confidence. For the first time in a while, i was able to go to the beach, actually swim and wet my hair in the sea without worries about washing and detangling afterwards. I felt ”Free”.
I am now very excited to be on this journey, to explore with new styles and to just simply ”enjoy life”.
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